It's Like Monica and Her Blue Cheese Fantasy

Credit: Planete Deco

My. Kinda. Home.

Sara Khanafiah, you wit me? 

Give up the household cleaning solution already

Following a massive migraine attack, which I haven't had in years, I woke up realising that my body is 

just. too. exhausted.

...and I think I have now learnt that it is okay to:

1. Not be a supermom.
2. Not be a superwife.
3. Not be a superdaughter.
4. Not be a superfriend (alas I have since relaxed on this for quite a while now).
5. Not be a - simply put, superanything.

You'd think that I enjoy being Type A but honestly, I could do away with some sloppy down time. Last night I saw (okay, more like heard, as I couldn't really open my eyes. oh the throbbing just won't go away for like seems indefinitely) how I could actually REALLY rely on my husband to help out with the chores and taking care of the baby. Honestly, he's great with the little crab and I perhaps had underestimated him all the while. He did dress her in daytime clothing though, but I guess I could pretend to not have noticed it.

See? No need to be a supermom/superanythingandeverything.

Little goal for the day: TO CAMP OUT IN FRONT OF THE TELLY WITH THE BABY AND NOT WORRY ABOUT THE DUSTY FLOOR.

You don't wanna know how dirty the floor is. Trust me.

Post Pendek Tidak Menyayat Hati

Jikalau belum mampu untuk mendapat zuriat, silalah cari anak kucing/hamster/mengkarung dan cuba jaga makan minum berak kencing sakit demam cirit sembelit dia dengan sepenuh hati. Selagi tak rasa jadi mak ayah (mak la especially kan) kita takkan tau rasa macam mana erti sayang orang lain selain diri kita kalau perlu mati tertonggeng pun tak apa asalkan anak sihat selamat semuanya okay. Dan semua ni mula dari saat kau nampak imej hitam putih sebesar beras kat screen tu.

Bila sampai masa kau terbongkok-bongkok kat tepi baby cot sambil mata dalam macro focus mode nak tengok anak bernafas ke tidak masa tido (lepas kau letak jari kat bawah hidung dia macam cerita polis zaman 80-an), seriously, give me a call.

Till then I'm gonna go worship my child at the altar I just built for her. Eheh.

To Be Blown Up For The Wall

When? Hahah don't ask. Being a stay-at-home momma doesn't mean I have all the time in the world.

One More Month and I'm Making a Comeback

5 months old today. Them nostrils keep flaring -_-'

Chubby Pea needs to learn separation anxiety management because Mommy will need to hit the weasel world (Dilbert, Adams, S., 2000s) again. As Aunty Bella puts it, "kerana duit tidak jatuh dari langit".
Mommy's version is probably "kerana duit tidak jatuh dari langit dan sudah melabur hampir RM30,000 untuk sambung belajar jadi takde sebab nak buat sijil jadi pekasam". As much as I love spending my days with you I need to make sure that I fulfill my ambitions and that I become a good role model for you.

I need you to understand that with hard work (God willing) you will achieve great things in life.

I need you to understand that you first need to work your ass off in school, because it will take you places and that having good education trumps money, inheritance and titles and a lot of other silly things in this silly world.

I need you to understand that as a girl you need to be very, very independent and that your family is just an anchor to support your journey towards success, not as a means to bail you out when you're stuck in the deep end, about to give up for the umpteenth time. And no, I'm not buying you private school education or buy your first car or first house or pay 100% of your wedding expenses or any of those things that will make you take us, your parents, for granted. Belajar dapat sesuatu dengan usaha sendiri, bukan dengan ASB/EPF withdrawal mak ayah.

I need you to understand that in life, we should only think about going forward and not hold on to failures of the past. Have faith that today is going to be better than yesterday and that tomorrow is going to be better than today. If you hit a road block, understand that God only wants to make your experience extra special and you will come out of it better off than before.

My darling Pea, I have strong reasons to name you "noble strength". No, I didn't know then that it's the same as an MTV reality show star. It doesn't matter - just don't go attempting the entertainment world when you grow up.

As you grow older you will realise that I am a strict, totally rigid mother but trust me it's because I want you to be the best person that you can be. You will hate me at times. You will want to run away from home. But you will hold back from doing anything stupid because I make you your favourite meals that you don't get elsewhere.

Now be a good girl and accept the fact that you're gonna spend your days, 5 in a week, with a gajillion other screaming kids at the daycare centre. Go learn how to kick boys in their nether regions. I might as well start you young.

And when friends/teachers ask you what your mom does, say she's a drill sergeant. Eheh.

Funny, We Have Never Even Met (for real) Despite Having Attended the Same School. Shame On YOU, Mak Odena!

Odens went to sleep at 1230hrs tonight. Hahhhh biar benar tido awallll????? 

So I checked my blog and somehow clicked on her profile pic and "bam!" discovered that she had long since wrote again. 

So that's how I spent the last 1.5 hours, of which, could have been utilised to savour my precious sleep time but no regrets, for I had fun catching up on the last 4 years.

You're on my bookmark list (again!) Bells, and my wish is that for you to have a paeds ward-free stories this year :)

Aside to the 5 people who follow this blog, go read this. It makes you understand now why you should appreciate SAHMs. Yes, because they/we see the lighter side of things among the throngs of snot/tantrum/goldfish crackers-on-the-floor/fever/poop/etc etc episodes. Because SAHMs don't deserve to be looked down upon as if they (we)'re living off what little dough the husbands bring home at month end by (as the Malays call it) "dangling our feet in mid air at home". << ahhh mungkin juga. Cuba buat scissors untuk ketatkan perut yang geleber2 lepas beranak ni, but hey, I'm only 49kg post-partum. Much thinner/lighter than those of you you haven't popped little earthlings out of your vajayjay.  Riak. Hah. Hah. Hah.

I still can't bring myself to bake the goddamnrainbowcake for the Annual Jimba Picnic (dari monthly selo selo dah jadi annually bila semua beranak pinak). Eeeee too much hassle. So I'll probably make this:

Now. Smile, people. Smile.

I Blame You, You Awesome Half Glass of Teh Tarik!

Can't sleep and munching on kaya pau. Yum.

Is that paper I'm chewing?

Pop Cultured

Hello, it's me again. Yes, the lady who's obsessed with her child. Oh goody goody for today what will it be?

Here's my 167th attempt to make her look more girlish. On a scale of 1 to 10, I'd say it's a level 6.5 failure. We need to understand our pinks better and in the meantime keep resorting to the foolproof giant flower headband.

On a side note, I am clueless about this whole sharifah-bawani fiasco. Call me ignorant but I have poop and spit to attend to (She's teething and this cheapo mom can only afford to give the baby her arm to soothe the itch. Gnaw away little one. I have more of those extra flesh in my mid section.)

Oh, did I mention that this is her intense look watching THS - Selena Gomez? And kid got so excited when I followed up with I Love You Like a Love Song on YouTube. No joke, man. She went "eeeeeeeeee!!!!!". I need to come to terms with the possibilities of my daughter coming home with a blonde mop top dude. Oh boy.

I really have no idea on how to conclude this entry cohesively or to decide whether writing about not wanting to have to pee on a stick in a few week's time is appropriate (it'snotandiknowit).

Erk.

Because I Have Flooded Instagram & Twitter Enough for People to Curse Me

My motivation is the clock striking 2 on Tuesday afternoon, meaning I will hence have a worry-free 4-week break where I won't have to go through my daily routines laced with guilt because at the back of my mind I kept thinking "school assignments" (read: major procrastination and blaming baby blues). Also motivating me is the vision of graduation day with my loved ones, especially with a toddler age Audrina carrying a huge bouquet of flowers for Mommy.

In one year and eight and a half months time.

HAH, KAU DAH HILANG AKAL KE BAJET TAHUN DEPAN BARU NAK CONVO?

NAK MUNTAH DARAH BUAT MASTERS LAMA-LAMA MACAM TU??

TAK BEST OKEH.

Okay. I think I need me some nasik lemak now. The anxiety is killing me. Tolonglah pass paper hari Selasa ni.

Uhuk. Uhuk.

The Wait

15 January 2013

ETA: 1800hrs

A perfect complement to a killer paper exam day.

Now I don't know whether to feel anxious or excited.