Pink is the Colour of Passion. Pink Ribbon?

Have you ever donned that tiny pink ribbon on your lapel? If you ever had donated even 1 cent to breast cancer awareness fund raising drives, what did you really feel towards the cause? I have always supported the campaigns in little ways (amounts), sympathised with families affected by the disease and in awe by stories of those who survived the battle. That was the extent of how much I cared and I simply move on with my routines like it's no different than any day.

Never have once did I think that I would be affected so much by the disease (if ever) in my life. Not even with my paternal aunt's passing away of breast cancer last December (we weren't close so all I could do was feel sorry for the children who are already adults anyway). But things change abruptly within seconds, don't they?

October is Breast Cancer Awareness month.

4 October 2009, ironically, was when we found out that one of my maternal aunts has breast cancer.

7 October 2009, was when we learnt that it is a rare type of cancer, one that started from the lymph node and not the tissue, one that STARTLED the doctors as it has only been the second patient they discovered having this condition, one that they classified as Stage 3 going to 4.

If it is hard for us, it is even harder for her. How long do we need to pretend that it is okay to live life as it has always been? How long do we need to pacify her with encouraging words when she herself knows what's coming her way soon? All those drugs they want to pump into her, the radiation, the surgery...

We pray day and night for her to be strong for she can't conceal her tears despite doing it in hiding away from us all.

It is not easy to balance reality and hope all at once.

Are we all aware of life, even?